0047 – 28 November 2006
Dari Yang Terdalam…
I always asked myself, what do I want in life? What I really, really want to fulfill my desire? Also, what is my purpose in life?
Going through life in all these years, watched one to one of my dreams slipped away from me. Some of them, I slipped on purpose, but many of them were accidentally slipped and taken off from me in such a way that I am not approved.
I always said this, life is life. It is subjective. It can’t be predictable. Yes, I always said that.
But sometimes, there are times when I questioned back to myself, what kind of life this is, when I felt nothing except loneliness and lose of hope.
I admit it happened to me most of the time. And things that happened had shaped me into the way that I am today.
I am not a perfect person, nor a foul person. I have strengths, I have weakness. Sometimes I used my strength well, but sometimes it seems like my weakness has dominated me.
Going through these entire years make me realized, there are things that should not be granted. It might slip away and make you mourn of it.
It happened to me from time to time. On my positive mind, I always want to see the bright side of it. Look for the rainbow in every storm, they say. But what if, the storm is too harsh and the rainbow is far away from being seen?
On my negative mind, this is what I want to talked about. I always terribly look to my problems as the source for me to mourn of my fate and destiny. I know, in the process of that, I was doing nothing to improve. I am getting used to those feelings, and somehow I always allow myself to be entertained by it.
But, when it comes for me to realized how I am being fooled all these time, I was doing nothing, except crying. Sometimes it makes me better, sometimes it doesn’t.
The question is, how long will all these affect me, as I, myself has not enough energy to cry anymore. I’m tired of it, I’m sick of it!
P/s – don’t bother about the ‘tone’ of this entry, I just express it truly from my heart. Dari Yang Terdalam…
Salam Ramadhan
8 years ago
3 comments:
Salam..
Ignore the tone?? Hehe.. Aku ingat lagi komen kau pd blog aku arituh.. Pasal 'depressed tone' yang kita gne.. Rasanya, hidup ni tak pernah lari dr masalah, kan? Bila kita rasa gembira waktu ni, tetiba je sesuatu jadi yang buat kita sedih, marah, etc. Tapi tu lumrah, kan?
Pape pun, cheer up man!! No one's perfect and tak salah kalau kita berfikiran negatif sekali-sekala.. Tu menunjukkan kita ni sekadar manusia yang lemah..
Anyway, ni lirik Richard Marx - Ready to Fly.. I hope you'll find your own wings to fly, k.. =)
I've been trying to open the door
To the secret of my destiny
And every new road I think is the one
Seems to lead right back to me
I've looked for a way to be wiser
A way to be strong
Now I see the answer was hiding
In me all along
Chorus:
And I'm ready to fly
Over the sun
Like a rocket to heaven
And I'm ready to soar
Right through the sky
Never dreamed I'd find something to lift me so high
I've always had wings
But I wasn't ready to fly
Restless, hopeless, and misunderstood
Like so many others I know
So busy tryin' to keep holdin' on
When I should've been letting go
I was given the gift to find it
The spirit inside me
But I never really imagined
All I could be
The answer to all of my wonder
Was right in my hands
Now it's time for me to discover
All that I am
PS : Keep on being yourself, don't change because others ask it from you. Do it because you really want it to.. Salam..
you are what you are..=)
--> pari-pari
salam... well i see that this entry is mostly in english.. way to go man!!
hmm about the tone stuff.. i choose to read it without the depressed tone. so, it is like reading a story of a journey of a young boy who become a man rite now. well.. all those things in life create our characters unique.
a change of tone:
you are what you eat! obviously.. lolz
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